Friendship is very important.
When we have a foundation of good, secure connections, everything we do to achieve in our occupations improves. Although basic research suggests this, many people who are focused on their work risk losing contact with their closest social contacts.
Close friends, according to psychologists, are nonrelatives with whom we celebrate birthdays, with whom we discuss personal concerns such as job or marital difficulties, and with whom we could seek assistance with a move or a medical emergency.
These individuals are vital to our psychological and physical health. Friendship quantity and strength have long been a reliable indicator of emotional well-being. Beyond the psychological advantages, friendships may have an impact on our fundamental physiology, as evidenced by research linking social relationships to cellular-level disease prevention. If we have a strong network of friends, we are less likely to develop a cold or experience severe stress reactions. A recent meta-analysis of 148 research found that having good social interactions was linked to a 50% lower risk of death.
Maintaining intimate connections, on the other hand, is becoming increasingly difficult for ambitious professionals. When you consider how sorry people are about losing touch with pals, the situation becomes all too evident.
Relationships and Regret
Adults tend to regret romantic, family, and friend ties later in life, according to psychological study, and there is a consistent pattern of top regrets centered on love and work — that is, romantic, family, and friend connections on the one hand, and career, job, and education on the other. (Financial mistakes score only behind these regrets concerning love and career.) For example, my research with Mike Morrison and Kai Epstude examined over 1,300 people across five studies and discovered that the most common regrets were related to relationships and careers. Relationship regrets were expressed considerably more passionately than regrets regarding professions or other nonsocial areas of life. What worried them the most was the lack of, or dysfunction in, social bonds. Furthermore, we discovered that the degree to which people thought their core desire to belong was threatened by the lack or loss of relationships was connected to the level of social regret. Friendships were in seventh place in terms of regrets, followed by romantic partnerships and familial bonds. This indicates that while many people realize the immediate value of investing time on romantic and familial ties, friendships are not as high on their priority list. Friendships are frequently overlooked.
Friendship’s Current Challenge
Part of the problem now is that our understanding of friendship is always evolving. We’re growing our social networks, but our interpersonal bonds are deteriorating. Despite being overcommitted to work and family duties, having unprecedented geographic mobility, telecommuting rather than working alongside colleagues, and tapping or tweeting rather than conversing, we appear to have a large number of friends: around 200 social media friends and 11 IRL friends. Close friendships, on the other hand, average around five, while the most personal friends, with whom we would reveal, say, information about our sex life, average around two (down from about three in 1985). Busier schedules and work responsibilities are only going to make it more difficult to form, prioritize, and sustain close connections.
Taking the First Steps Towards More Meaningful Friendships
Friendships have never been more crucial for a successful job. Friendships improve your performance at work and help you earn more, according to research, partially because they create an emotional buffer that keeps you motivated and focused. As a result, it’s critical to consider how you might enhance the depth, worth, and duration of your connections.
Put out the effort. People lament the loss of once-close friends, yet friendships may be overlooked in favor of romantic and familial bonds. If you’re just starting out in your job, now is the time to focus on developing and maintaining your friendships. This entails reversing the normal drift away from friends that most of us experience as we focus more closely on professions and raising a family, especially during our twenties. Make arrangements rather than making excuses by calling a close friend instead of merely going to their Facebook page. Face time (not the iPhone version) takes precedence over Facebook time. Men have a tougher problem establishing one-on-one relationships than women, so they may have to work more to schedule time with pals.
Inquire about the opinions of your friends. It’s crucial to have friends, but it’s also necessary to know how to engage with them. Close friends may help us correct our mistaken opinions of ourselves, whether it’s over a job advancement we didn’t get or a terrible personal relationship. Friends encourage us to revel in our victories and to move on from defeats with our heads held high. The act of sharing and connecting in this way has the potential to help us develop and maintain strong connections.
Make plans based on common interests. Organize small groups around a certain subject, such as watching a movie, experiencing a new cuisine, planning a political event, or tackling a specific professional issue.
Make new acquaintances. Moving to a new city or country and leaving behind an established buddy network is a particular problem in today’s global economy. What does a New Yorker do when he or she is assigned to a one-year assignment in Singapore? It’s been really simple to connect with folks online who share our interests. Seek out like-minded folks in your area and meet up in person.
Make work and friendships a priority. Given the time and effort required for both, progressing at work and maintaining friendships may appear to be mutually incompatible, but they are not. Set aggressive career objectives, but don’t compromise intimate relationships in the process; give each one the attention it deserves. Friendships and careers may complement each other, such as when friends from various businesses come together to discuss big-picture career views, igniting each person’s desire to advance professionally.
Friendship is important, according to research, yet maintaining deep, personal social bonds has never been more difficult. Making and retaining friends does not need any unique abilities. At the end of the day, maintaining friendships is just as tough as managing a profession, but by following the methods above, and most importantly, by acknowledging that friendships require focus and work, you may improve your professional performance while also increasing your personal satisfaction.